Hot Dog Diplomacy

It's week 2+ of 5 in mrguy's radiation and chemo journey. He feels like shit. Wants to throw up, or he has diarrhea or he's constipated. He's sleep deprived and angry with everything.

On the other side of the fence our neighbor's beautiful wife died suddenly. He feels like shit and is being loud. Mrguy can't sleep with him acting out. I went to the wake on Friday. It was beautiful. But it's been days, now, of lack of peace. Kinda like when [name redacted]'s sister and mom passed away in weeks of each other. He acted out, I asked him to keep it down (not knowing the context) and that made things escalate.

Six months later mrguy saw him manning the grill at our block party, and told me "I'm taking one for the team." He does not usually eat pork or beef, but he sidled up to [name redacted], started a conversation and ate a hot dog. 

Hot dog diplomacy worked. We have been cool ever since.

Right now I'm at the place where I want to protect my man, but I don't want to ruffle any feathers. And mrguy just yelled at me, which made me cry. Mrguy tries not to bother people, and [name redacted] takes up so much space, as do all of the people in the neighborhood whose sounds and actions bother him. And the things that I do that he usually overlooks have also provoked him. Poor guy. I have taken refuge in the pasha lounge with some sewing and an audiobook.

Genealogy Updates

This has been soooo interesting. I am lucky that I got my mom to do a dna test. She's that much closer to the answer of who her ancestors are than I, right?

What has been answered definitively is that she is not related to her father's side of the family. And that she and her brother have the same father. And that a fellow who shows up as her nephew is an unknown son of her brother. My siblings and I have an unknown biological grandfather who was responsible for both of my grandparents' children. We are all related to my grandmother's side of the family. And all of us look like that side of the family including, very strongly, my newfound biological cousin.

What my mom's dna tells us is that in addition to the German roots in Saxony that I already know about and have researched, there are German roots in Bavaria. Recent german roots in Bavaria. I thought I knew everything about my Germans, and I did not.

The genealogists at Ancestry looked at my mom's dna and my own and her bio nephew. In addition to the recent Bavarian connections, they found other German genealogy matches in the "unassigned" areas of my mom's matches. With great effort they found ancestors that were in this additional German line. What they are seeing is that there was only one likely man who linked those two families together, and unlike all of his family, who lived for generations in Illinois, he lived 7 miles away from my grandmother during the time that my mom and her brother were born. I determined that he was in the automobile business during this time, which makes it even more likely that he would have come into contact with my grandmother and grandfather.

I am loving this.

Project Pause

I stopped where I needed to but am happy with the progress. Most of the pots match-ish, and I have new herbs growing at the top. As things grow in I can move them to different levels. Not sure what I'm going to do with the bottom three spots.

A lovely thing happened on the way home from the movie theater the other day. There were goats grazing on the field in the abandoned middle school. I pulled over and took photos. It smelled so goat-y, and they were chewing so loudly that I could hear them over the distant freeway, passing cars and light rail. I liked it so much that I took mrguy the next day to experience it.

Such goat variety!

Vacation Wednesday -- The Project Continues

I bought this wacky plant stand several months ago. It's been harder to get pots that fit than I thought. Yesterday I went to the Home Depot near work, since I had to go that way to get blood tests. I had partial success. For some reason three of the pots that are the same size won't fit in some of the holders. And then some of the holders are sizes that aren't common. So it's a bit of a mosh.

Also I need to Rustoleum the metal, and I really don't feel like doing it. And I am now seeing that this project is going to require patience, and trial and error.

But my goal became clear this week. What I really want is to get the front porch a bit tidier and to create an herb garden in the plant stand. There is enough room for the other things that I love, like succulents, but one thing that I have felt is lacking at the Big Brown Box is herbs. Accessible herbs. During the pandemic I had them in the aku room, but they eventually got buggy, so I gave up. Right now the aku room is kinda perfect. I have some great geraniums that are flowering like mad, and some weird succulents that I decided to like because they apparently like the room. It looks so darned great.

So here's what the week looks like.

Monday. A hodgepodge of pots and plants.

This morning I had some plants temporarily in random pots.

This afternoon I found *some*pots that fit and some saucers that I could use. In the meantime I repotted some orchids that came from my mom's house that have never bloomed. Hoping to find a home for them somewhere in the garden, but the maple trees seem to have made all of the front yard un-diggable. We'll see if I can get help. Or grow stronger ;)

Meanwhile, back on the ranch, mrguy is on Day 3 of his radiation. He slept a lot this afternoon and has now gone back to bed at 6:55. I watched the episode of Dr. Pimple Popper that was recorded after her stroke. She and her husband talked about how their children are in college and these are supposed to be their golden years, wondering what comes next. I cried while cooking greens.