Easter 2023 or Why In The Hell Did You Come, Anyway?

For those who don't understand the reference, it's from Harry Partch's Barstow

Easter is not my favorite holiday, by a mile. As a child it meant ham, church, getting pointed into the sun to take photos that were never good enough. Being heckled about squinting while the sun is burning your retinas while the un-good photo is being taken. 

But at least there is candy.

Two weeks ago my sister asked if we had plans for Easter for my mom. I hadn't thought that far. She made plans to come out for the weekend, and asked our former sister-in-law if she could join us for lunch. I would make reservations for us in the public dining room at mom's facility.

A week and a half ago mom was having some bad days and my sister was waffling about coming out. 

Last weekend the one sister asked my other sister and I to tell her whether she should come after all. We told her we understood her desire to stay home, and that a visit later was fine.

After hearing from us she said she was coming for Easter anyway.

That's what I thought the plan was until I read the whiteboard in Mom's apartment. My sister was coming mid-week after Easter, putting Easter back on my plate. Oy. Because my sister had made a fuss over Easter, I felt I had to do the same, even though I know that my mom doesn't understand holidays any longer. I got a basket on my Buy Nothing group, bought 50 bucks worth of candy (and Depends) at the drug store, bought a bag of mini avocados (egg shaped!!) to also put in the basket, ordered sandwiches from our sandwich shop for pickup today. Then I spent yesterday afternoon dyeing eggs and worrying about whether they'd be an acceptable color. 

I had low expectations, but STILL.

I got to the sandwich shop and it is closed for Easter. And now I have to chase them down for a refund.

I pivot -- who else is open today? I go to the Japanese market and get shrimp, which she loves. Some salad, some sushi, and bowls for soy sauce. Make some nice plates in her apartment and...nothing. She's barely awake and not happy. Easter basket? No response. She was falling asleep, and sushi seems too complicated for her to eat now. She hated the shrimp (this has never happened in known history). Plus she wasn't really speaking to me.

As Harry Partch said in Barstow "Why in the hell did you come, anyway".

I asked the caregiver if it was too late to get lunch from the memory care dining room. My mom was asleep. 

I snuck away, swearing quietly to myself as I walked through the garage to my car.