December Blues

This fall I have been punching above my weight for so long that I finally snapped. I've given presentations, been interviewed many times on zoom, on the phone, on camera. With my colleagues I've given tours, pulled material from the archives for visitors. I participated in our company's Halloween, which is a big deal and stressful. And I was invited to submit a form for consideration for the top worldwide forklift association, which was stressful. I created an event that had many parts and was kinda a big deal also -- and I've had increasing feelings of discomfort in my department meetings, in which I blew up a few weeks ago, and I have felt responsible and awful ever since. This week, before I had a chance to talk to my boss about what has been happening, we had an offsite that included a personality test which I flunked, and had a conflict resolution discussion in which I cried. Recently, at the same time, on my off days and sometimes on my on-days I've had to have two hour conversation with my sister or all of my sibs about my mom's complicated estate. And our combined family business. Mrguy, who has cancer and has been feeding me every day and listening to his tear-stained wife. It's a lot. So today I'm going to concentrate on nice things.

I should post this in Calibri.