The oldest person in the world died this week. Gertrude Baines was 115 and ate bacon, fried chicken and ice cream. Complained a lot about her bacon not being crisp enough. Loved God.
A few years ago we went to the estate sale of one of the last veterans of WWI. He was the oldest man in the state. The wack-job running the sale wrote "Oldest Man" on everything that was tagged. An old Philco television sitting in the entryway bore a tag that said "Oldest Man Television $50".
Taped to the Oldest Man refrigerator was a hand printed set of instructions for how to cook his Eggo waffle and sausage, which were the only things he ate in the last few years of his life. Oldest Man was really interesting before he got to be so old (we did a little research), but I guess his longevity became his most outstanding (and final) achievement.
If I make it to some unreasonable age, I hope that someone chuckles when I complain about my bacon.
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