I Know Why

I know why you fell, Russian skater.

You were distracted by shame. The shame that they made you wear a polyester outfit from Medieval Times on the ice.

You, too, Blue Man. You blinded yourself with that shiny spandex.

Mr. Smirnoff, dressed like a brown Reddy Kilowatt, I worried for you but you did o.k.

I see a new trend, though. It was the Americans, I think, who dressed like normal people. If this sport stops channeling Elton John, I'll watch more often.

See what you can do.